the waiting...

been trying to get over this flu/yuk/whatever it is. Vowed to take it easy. Vowed to not do *anything*---including blog if it gets too much for me. Vowed I will not run myself into the ground "slogging through" like I have done so many times before. Well, keeping my promise to myself. But...

find myself having anxiety issues more than usual.

It could be several things, all of which have nothing to do with not blogging and taking it completely easy. It could. But I am over here blogging right now because it usually calms me down and I am looking for some "relax" time STAT!

I had a bad scare today when I was making out the bills and the money orders for the peeps who don't take credit or debit when I accidentally reversed the trailer storage payment with the rent money order. Yep. That tired/yukky, I am, I am...

I caught it before I mailed them off (the nightmare of that possibility still gives me the shudders). Seems silly to get so het up over something like that right? Right...except...my landlords are super nice people but they wouldn't hesitate to put me on the street if there was a mess up with the rent and I couldn't pay them right away and that is what would possibly happen if I had mailed the money orders off to the wrong peeps. Seems melodramatic but it is true because frankly, I don't have an extra rent check laying around to mail off if I make a mistake. Things are that close to the bone. One screw up and this house turns into a house of cards. Yep. That might be (and probably is) why I'm having some major anxiety issues today.

Realizing how close we are dancing to the fire with no water close at hand...

So, I'm going to be pro-active and turn this into a positive and plan so *IF* something like this did ever happen, I will have an emergency plan in place to deal with it. Easier said than to implement but planning means I'm one step closer (or two or three) to being able to implement contingency plans than if I had no plan.

Oh...tired again. Off for another nap. I am feeling somewhat better though, both physically and emotionally...flu is receding hopefully and anxiety lessening now that I've written some of it out. Yeah, to sleep and get some real rest would be nice...I'm closer now, so I guess I'll go try. Have a good evening y'all...