a mixed bag

For all of you who are missing your loved ones during the holidays, I'm sending you hugs and prayers for ease because it can be so hard this time of year missing them and the world can seem so much colder and darker for it at times. Missing a loved one who has passed is just miserable at any time, it just seems so much worse sometimes during the holidays.

This time of year is a mixed bag for me. There is Christmas coming (yay!) and looking forward to time spent with family (yay!yay!yay!) and the kids on their breaks and enjoying all of it (oh yeah!) but there's also this time of year different anniversaries of loved ones that have passed. Maggie B. (yesterday) and my beloved Aunt Jan (Saturday) and my grandpa Tom's birthday on Tuesday. This is also our first Christmas without Dad. All these people who I will miss for the rest of my life who used to be such a huge part of our holidays and every day.

It's been a brutal year and I'll be glad to see the back of it.
Like I said, it's a mixed bag for me because I'm also looking forward to the holidays and spending time with my family, I love seeing my nieces and nephews and hearing their stories and what they've been up to and best of all, hearing them laugh. I know my blessings when I see them running by or stop to give me hugs and I cherish them but I also wish I could share these awesome kids of mine and my siblings with loved ones who aren't here anymore so yes, I'm sad about that but thinking about them all together: Now that would be one heck of a party!

Hugs and prayers going out to those that need them.